Please take a minute to pray for my old neighborhood, Prospect Heights, which is about to get anally raped, tortured, beaten, and left for dead by the Barclays Center, which opens today.
Most of you haven’t seen the monstrosity, but suffice it to say that it’s jammed, like a rusty fucking remnant from the moment of the apocalypse, in an idyllic residential area with literally no public parking spots.
The 40/40 Club inside the stadium opened the other day with a party attended by Rihanna and the entire cast of the Jersey Shore. Tonight, 19,000 people are expected to arrive for a Jay-Z concert. Before, all of my cozy neighborhood haunts will be overrun with douchebags looking for overpriced beers. By midnight, Prospect Heights, as it was, will be no more.