Everyone is all up in arms about Duchess Catherine’s titties being exposed in a French tabloid this past week. By everyone I mean the royal press corporation, the Daily Mail, and Fergie, who thought she had cornered the market on royal tittie shots in tabloid magazines. Fortunately for Fergie, William was not sucking on Kate’s toes at the time the photographs were taken.
Honestly, I kind of don’t give a shit, in the sense that it doesn’t feel like such a big deal. I mean, it’s so common to sunbathe topless in France that I would probably do it, even though my ladies haven’t peeked out of the mound of tissues I stuff in my bra since I’ve been 16. I’m kidding, but seriously. The price the royals pay for being able to stay in private villas in France with all of the food they want is that everything they do has the potentiality of being exploited by the media.
If Kate Middleton doesn’t want tittie pictures of herself in the tabloid magazines, then she shouldn’t sit out on a balcony facing the road showing her ladies off, no matter how remote an area she is in. Some some weirdo is going to be sitting 2 miles from her house, using a moon-range lens to capture every inch of her body, because it is going to make them money. If Prince Harry doesn’t want to be photographed naked banging on a drum, then he should only play the flute.
More ridiculous than Kate herself being outraged is the people who are outraged on her behalf. Who takes these sitting ducks seriously, anyway? All that they’re good for is changing outfits, reminding us that it’s nice to support children’s hospitals, and making money for the tabloid media.
That being said, I’m sorry that you were exposed in such a manner, Kate Middleton. At the same time, I’m happy that William taps your ass. Literally. Hot photo.